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My son and one girl seem to gravitate towards each other and I haven’t really tackled this. we cling to the idea, although the world has moved on without it, I’m afraid.It seems harmless enough, but I feel like I need to have a more thoughtful approach to the advice my husband and I give, and the rules. Or rather, it means something very different from what we’d like it to mean.But somehow, even at this late date, we hesitate to re-think how we will do things with our own children.We continue along as if somehow our children will manage. If you want your children to have the wherewithal to — not to at everything — who could give that to their children?For years, I have been repeating, “no dating until you are 18” and we have had some good conversations about the pitfalls of dating too young.We get together with some other families, and my teens do invite other teens over for games and hanging out.

With no hesitation, the daughter said, “You have sex.” With all kinds of thoughts reeling through her head, the mother asked, “Where did you hear that? In an informal survey of teens, many of them stated that they have never had a conversation with their parents about dating other than curfew and expectations concerning drinking and driving.The young man’s mother did a very good job teaching manners and etiquette to her son.He ate with us at Easter and even brought flowers and a dessert. That said, this is still my daughter we’re talking about and I’m not naïve. No father likes to see his daughter cuddled with a boy.Today, the average age for a person to begin dating is 13. Research has shown that serious adolescent relationships before either partner is emotionally mature can have detrimental effects for identity formation and even life and health.Adolescents who are dating because of peer pressure or a need to belong can experience significant disappointment.

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